OMG Becky it’s nearly summer time and School is almost out of session! We need to band together to form
THE BABYSITTERS CLUB!

Ya’ll remember watching the 1995 movie rendition of the popular book series? Come on, ya gotta recall the film boasting an allstar cast ( basically just Rachel Leigh Cook and I can assume her career isn’t flourishing anymore) Anyway I remember because I lived by that shit. (Truthfully, I only read the books. I was more of a Harriet the Spy type a gal, but that’s a whole different can o’ 90’s worms).

Here’s a little trailer to refresh those dusty marbles rolling in yer noggin’

Yea, maybe the movie stunk to pre-teen high heaven, but it is currently holding a strong 5.8 on IMDB-
No no no, I’m not trying to convince you to watch it.
Honestly don’t.
Just take the quiz and call it good.

Please.
Please take my quiz…

MEET THE GIRLS!

Kristin “Kristy” Amanda Thomas

Position: Club President Birthday: August 20 Age: 13
WHOA THERE COWGIRL Kristy puts the ‘Boss’ in the mildly sexist term ‘Bossy’. Loud Mouthed and Overbearing, Kristy is the brain behind The Babysitters Club. After school activities include: coaching a softball team and hanging out with her BFF Mary Anne. She’s no fashionista. Commonly she dresses in plain jeans, a T-shirt, baseball cap adorned with a Collie to commemorate the Family Dog and a worn out pair of sneakers. Though she comes off as arrogant and in charge, Kristy struggles with deep rooted Daddy issues ever since her father walked out on the family when she was 6 years old. The last words she heard him say were “Your mother is a tramp”. She plans to get this tattooed on her arm when she turns 16. Kristy is known for her bright and refreshing ideas and when she ain’t hitting a home run she’s chillin’ with her two goldfish ‘Dexter’ and ‘Larry’

Welcome to the Club Kristy!

Claudia Lynn Kishi

Position: Vice President Birthday: July 11 Age: 13
You Go Girl! Talented, sophisticated, trendy, Claudia is the real deal! Her hobbies include jewelry making, sculpting and gossiping about hott boys and her favorite band WDW with her gal pal Stacy. Claudia landed the position of Vice President mainly because she has a phone in her room and has agreed to take after hours calls. Otherwise she doesn’t get along with Kristy and has been known to call her a ‘raging cunt‘ behind her back. Claudia is always seen dressed to the nines and flashing her favorite color Purple. Though she seems like what every young female would aspire to be, Claudia has a major flaw. She’s an addict. To junk food that is. Yet, studies have shown that due to hormonal changes and the urge to fit in, Claudia has the personality type to easily become a victim to heroin and ultimately could end up a meth head. Claudia and Mary Ann fight over drug use as Claudia sees smoking a fag or two not a big deal- she’s only experimenting, get a grip- it looks ‘cool‘. Claudia is always comparing herself to her older, genius sister Janine. She is constantly in Janine’s shadow. Claudia hides her candy and Nancy Drew books in her room as her parents don’t approve of her lifestyle. She’s is just misunderstood and uses fashion as a coverup. Though she woofs down snickers bars and pints of Benny and Jerrys, she keeps a slim figure stereotypical of her Asian genes.

Welcome to the Club Claudia!

Anastasia “Stacey” Elizabeth McGill

Position: Treasurer Birthday: April 3 Age: 13
A real “New Yorker” Stacey is Claudia’s best gal pal. A type 1 diabetic, Stacey is frequently hospitalized for DKA because she can’t help but refuse Claudia’s junk food. Misery loves company they say. Boy crazy, Stacey eventually leaves the Club when she gets a boyfriend. A hot young 16 year old stud by the name of Robert Brewster, aka Rudy, but she quickly realizes Rudy is just in it for the Sex and Stacey is a girl of modest class. Gifted at Math and telekinesis, Stacey takes care of the Baby Sitters club capitol though she has been known to skim off the top at times to pay for her medical bills.

Welcome to the Club Stacey!

Mary Anne!

Position: Secretary Birthday: September 22 Age: 13
Mary Anne is club secretary based on her one and only skill: Neat Handwriting. She’s BFF’s with Kristi though, unlike Kristy’s Tom-Boy edge, Mary Anne loves to experiment with Makeup- That highlight doe. Mary Anne enjoys Reading, Sewing, indulging in Classic movies and hanging out with Logan Bruno. They’ve been going steady for some time now. (blush blush). Mary Anne is shy, most likely because her father is an overprotective lawyer hard-ass, her BFF is a psychotic control freak and her mother was a chronic chainsmoker and passed away from lung cancer. Nonetheless, Mary Anne is a great listener who loves ponies and lipgloss. Due to the death of her mother, Mary Anne is a strong advocate against smoking. She tends to bump heads with Claudia since Claudia has been known to openly try new things including cigarettes, pot and the occasional 8 ball.

Welcome to the Club Mary Anne!

Dawn Read Schafer

BABYSTTR-CTIT-CT-SE-90

Position: Alternate Officer Birthday:Febuary 5 Age: 13
Born in California, this boho princess is OBSESSED with a vegetarian diet, healthy lifestyle and The Grateful Dead. Her interests include: Couch tour, Environmentalism, Ghost Stories and tarot card reading. Though she absolutely HATES sugary snacks, she bonds with Claudia over a bowl of California Kush and loves to drop a hit of some clean family fluff. FAR OUT MAN. When she moved to StoneyBrook Connecticut, she met Mary Anne and the two ultimately became step-sisters when their parents married. Kristy, Mary Anne’s BFF is insanely jealous over the step-sisters close relationship, but she should just cool her jets- WhatEver!

Welcome to the club Dawn!

Mallory Pike

Position:Junior Officer Birthday: May 2 Age: 11
Book worm and closet Lesbian, Mallory struggles with her brace-face and ginger hair. Don’t worry Mal, you’ll grow into yourself soon enough. She’s always fantasizing about Stacey and sometimes it gets her into trouble like when she was discovered stealing Stacey’s hairbrush and a pair of worn underpants after a slumber party. What a freak. At first Mallory was unfairly denied access into the babysitters club due to her young age so she formed “Kids Incorporated”. The business plan failed miserably after Kristy barged in and demanded she’ll get Mary Anne’s lawyer father involved for robbing her ideas. This girl has sticky fingers.
Mallory is the oldest of 8 children so she’s always competing for her parents attention. Being a thief has spawned from lack of personal space. When she is finally added to the club, Mallory ceases to tone down the creeper vibe, but the girls are a little flattered by it really.

Welcome to the Club Mallory!

Jessica “Jessi” Davis Ramsey

Position: Junior Officer Birthday: June 30 Age: 11
The token black friend, American Sign Language master and Best Friend to Mallory, Jessi is a force to reckon with! She’s a gifted ballet dancer and has a little brother nicknamed ‘Squirt’. Jessi finds it hard to fit in with the older girls in the babysitters club because they all act color-blind in their white suburban neighborhood. Outside of her daily involvement in the club, Jessi experiences harsh racism. This creates a lot of pressure for the young girl and she eventually joins the #blacklivesmatters movement after she was accused of stealing a pack of gum from the clubhouse even though it was her BF Mallory who was the culprit.

Welcome to the Club Jessi!– (but don’t get too comfortable. You’re mostly included so the club appears ‘diverse’).

Let the Quiz Commence!

Which personality best describes you?

Are your brows on fleek and your highlight poppin'?

What do you identify as

Have you ever tried drugs?

Truth or Dare! Are you a virgin?

Quick, Kevin from gym class slid a note to you. What would you do?!

Snapchat or Instagram?

Would you rather pop your BFFs pimple or eat a pickled herring and pork liver sandwich?

Bra vs Bralette?

How often do you read?

  • LeMon

    watching that trailer, and man, what a soundtrack! Babysitters club so hip

    • PANTSUIT

      Totally has the cranberries.

  • LeMon

    Hell yeah! Stacey! but I would rather go by Anastasia, is that cool? or is that not a Stacey thing to do?

    • PANTSUIT

      Stacey is the hottie-watch out for Mal though

    • Cooolin

      I’m a proud Stacey but will go my Madame McGill thank you very much.

    • Doris Montgomery

      STACEY BABY

  • raptor jesus

    I’m Mary Anne! But my handwriting is awful… but my dad will sue you if you talk shit about it!

  • Cooolin

    Club Stacey baby, can’t wait to ditch ya’ll for the next hunk o’ man meat that catches my ol telekinetic eyeballs.

  • Saul Wright

    “basically just Rachel Leigh Cook”

    um, hello, have you heard of a little lady called Alex MOTHERFUCKING Mack?!

    • PANTSUIT

      No, I didn’t have cable TV like all the other white children growing up. You know what I had? An antennae and we had to take turns holding that shit. I only recognized that actress from 10 things I hate about you (which is my guilt free favorite rendition of Taming of the Shrew).

  • Blochead4real

    I’m Mallory Pike