Welcome Mother Gopher.
We are here to celebrate Mother Gopher’s month of February. February is named after Mother Gopher Februarisiss, the world’s first Gopher.
Follow me in Februarisiss’s prayer:
“We pray to suckle from Mother Gophers ample breast in order to enrich our empty souls. We pray to burrow within the Earth in search of worms and other small insects to sacrifice to Mother Gopher. We pray to shower with the thought of Mother Gopher. If we are aroused by the thought we prayMother Gopher will gnaw off the aroused extremity. In all things we give praise to Mother Gopher. Amen.”
May you have a Blessed February. Remember to do unto others as you would do unto the kind Gopher.